Change is the only constant.
Me, looking for a non existent pack of potato chips at 1 am in the morning has been a constant forever.
Why am I like this? My inner self, who secretly wishes for a glass skin asks me.
What am I going to flaunt that skin for when I can't have the crispy goodness once in a while?
Sacrifice one to achieve another, the walls seem to echo. You all mind your own business Walls. You have only ears. You don't have taste buds and you can never appreciate the taste of potato chips. You are doomed to hear only the crunchy sound it makes. Walls drop some tears and stopped me from my journey towards glass skin. Wait, how did they cry when they have only ears?
The room is wide and white and yet, when the clock strikes past 12, I am afraid to take a step away from the confines of my cot and the mess I have created around it. My bag that lies on the floor is the border that I refuse to cross at night even when my bladder threatens to destroy me.
But hunger surpasses fear in the test which was supervised by people with 30 bmi. BMI 30 or not, my hunger took me to the heavens, sorry, kitchen. May be water is my food for the day. Hydrogen and Oxygen can be my raita and brinji.
I switch off the lights and, I was about to clos e my eyes, fearing that Annabelle will be coming for my Raita and Brinji anytime. But before my Raita could be snatched by Annabelle (Annabelle, you have super powers. Go for Biriyani. Leave my Raita alone!), my sharp eyes fell on something shiny that was being reflected by the lights from the corridor. Thanks to the next-door neighbour, who always forgets to switch off the light, I found my Holy grail.
Where are you going? What is the Holy Grail?
My hands and mouth full with Murukku, I use my eyes to reply. I am not a wall, you see.
Thursday, 10 October 2019
Change is the only constant.
Wednesday, 7 August 2019
Sitting on the bed and munching on the driest biscuit possible, Thoughts were allowed to come.
The eerie silence and a piercing cry from somewhere won't stop me from eating the last biscuit. I look at the Tea that has gone cold but striving to maintain the colour that might go dark. How different am I from that Tea?
Is this a question for me or the Tea?
If I am allowed to think at 3AM, this will be the musings of my mind that doesn't wander much.
Dawn will be there soon and the birds have started chirping early. In this world that strives for discipline and uniformity, no one follows the norm, not even the bird singing when the sky is pitch dark. Is it the sound that dissipates the darkness?
The timer in my phone shows 3.15. Fifteen minutes of absolute peace. Why do I find bliss at 3 AM with a biscuit I hate and a tea bag dipped in water?
I am not talking about life lessons. I just need my space and my moment and I wish I could hear the sound of the early morning. No, I will be sleeping.
Because this is Life. There you go, your life lesson.
Sunday, 6 May 2018
One simple smile is enough,
To make you go crazy.
My simple mind tells me, that
One sign, and
That is all, for someone to smile!
Is it so?
One word, and that is all
I can go from being at the
Bottom of the world,
To a person with flowing energy.
My mind also tells me,
That it is its doing.
Why do I believe that?
I shouldn't. But I do.
For, the mind is what says yes
To what it wants, and
Being a spectator is being myself
To what I make myself be.
I am both the receiver and the giver,
Giving happiness and,
Receiving sadness from myself.
I am being played
I am making myself do this
And I am being happy doing that,
By saying to myself that I can
By being me.
Monday, 29 January 2018
Do you know where the story of Silapathigaram should have ended?
When Madhavi leaves Kovalan and when he is alone in the streets(Nadutheruvula)
But sadly it doesn't end there.
Kovalan goes back to Kannagi.
Did Kovalan think Kannagi as a back-up?
Kannagi wholeheartedly accepts him back.
Come on Lady! He cheated on you!
He took all your money and spent it on another woman! And you accept him back? Your wish!
Because of "Kallanalum Kanavan Pullanalum Purushan"? Which would have been possibly said by a spineless chauvinistic jackass.
And finally Kovalan gets killed and Kannagi has so much anger that she could have burned the city down!
Many say that it is wrong for Kannagi to burn down the whole city for the mistake of one person.
People can find fault even in Kannagi when she is a girl who was brought up in a way that she tolerated her husband her whole life!
But she is at fault.
Because she must not have let her stray husband take away her life, happiness and wealth.
And importantly she let him come back to her when he couldn't be together with Madhavi. How stupidly can one teach a society?
Kovalan didn't feel the guilt to have left her and he didn't even come back on his own. He came only when there was nowhere else to stray for him.
What should have Kannagi did then?
She should have had her huge anger that even a whole city couldn't tolerate at that time. She should have showed anger.
No soodu soranai there.
And also their last single treasure is taken by Kovalan to start a business. But he didn't have the capacity to find a good seller and finds one as bad as him. "Inam inathodu dhaan serum"
And gets cheated. A taste of his own medicine!
And gets killed. Which he deserved for being a douchebag.
But Kannagi has to save the day again with her silambam.
Kannagi didn't do anything that deserved appreciation.
And how is she portrayed as?
Symbol of chaste. What nonsense?
It is there everywhere.
She is supposedly the role model of how a wife should be.
May be next to the wife of Thiruvalluvar who has to say to her husband that the bucket is still defying gravity.
But Kannagi for now.
Why shouldn't she be a rolemodel?
This was just a story and she has zero qualifications to rock the role of a role model.
But, why is she a rolemodel?
Let us think like anti-feminists.
1. She stayed loyal to her straying husband
2. She accepted all his stupidity
3. She gave away everything for her husband and he was her life.
4. She didn't speak against him.
5. She didn't get angry when he cheated.
So in simple terms, she was a coward, and acted like a loyal slave.
So if a woman doesn't speak against her male relatives and family and accepts all the atrocities done to her and silently suffers by paying 12% GST every month to her luxury goods and if she acts like everything according to rules written by chauvinistic pigs, society says she is fit to be a woman.
(Society in the sense - people that includes both men and women - who were taught the above said qualifications for a girl. No such set of serious terms and conditions were found to be in their book for men)
She is noble because she sacrificed everything for her husband and didn't live her life and spoiled her own life. How great is she!
- Society (from the times of Silapathigaram, as seen here)
And Silapathigaram is taught in schools and Kannagi is made to be believed to be the example of their future self in yiung girls and boys grow thinking that if their wife is a 'Kannagi' which she should be, they can do whatever they want and men can be men.
And if a woman says that Kannagi deserved a happy life and she shouldn't have felt the need to 'ADJUST' whatever her husband did, then she is termed 'Feminist or Feminazi'.
And the society quietly shakes their head and goes and hides behind the book "How to insist upon chauvinism and claim it as tradition"
I hope women of today and tomorrow will learn how not to be a Kannagi.
If you want to be a Kannagi because your society asks you to be like her, then take your choice. Be like Kannagi. But your future self will have no purpose and no voice just like her statue.
Wednesday, 20 December 2017
What is feminism?
Women are greater than men? Feminism is not that.
So, feminism is about demanding equal rights for women from men? Nope.
Feminism in the current state is often a misunderstood word. It could even the most misunderstood word. And some opportunists make a joke out of it. Ha ha ha! I am not able to laugh more than that. Sorry.
Feminism and Feminists are the need of the hour in my opinion. So, what is it? And who are they?
Everyone must be a feminist and everyone one must understand feminism. But in a world where humanity is losing its worth, only a few blessed people seek it and find feminism.
I have seen women saying that we should demand equal rights for ourselves from men. And they call it feminism. But I would like to say something different.
It may not be the case everywhere, but women do have all the rights in the world. The problem is some women surrender it to men and wait for men to order them around.
Why does the rights of a woman are given to a man? Who does it? The biggest irony in the answer is that the female herself does it.
It is because it is taught everywhere.
Let me recall a lesson of a 4 year old.
Who is the head of the family? Father!
Why is it ingrained in our society that a male is better and a female should be under his control?
Most of our films show a female always being protected by a male.
It all happens because everything in this world is happening in the eyes of a male. And females are forced to look at the society through the eyes of a male. It is high time that woman start seeing the world through the eyes of a female.
A child develops by learning from his classroom teachings, his teachers, his friends and also at home.
Even when i am writing this sentence, while talking about a child I use 'his'. Generalization in the eyes of a male amd the 'her' part doesn't need any special mention.
Going back to that child. His or her, whomsoever the child is, the surroundings and everything are inculcated deeply in the mind.
And as a result, everyone looks through the eyes of a male.
Whose fault is this? Definitely the female gender is at fault. I am saying it with full faith.
I name myself as a feminist and I blame the female gender for the current scenario. Why?
When for the first time, a female found that she was treated differently, she must have raised her voice. It didn't happen.
She accepted it. And somewhere it started. Ages ago.
She accepted to be treated low and she herself believed that it was the right thing to do.
And now, it is chaos. Right from the birth of a female child to death. Every single thing is chaos!
All thanks to a group of females who thought that they were better at being controlled and who surrendered the leash to the males with a smiling face.
Even now females have to fight for everything. And in doing so, society labels her as culture less and a disgrace. If she fights for justice, society says she is not behaving like a woman.
And with time, many men are brought up in a way that if a female talks back at them, she is rude. If she questions them, she is being inappropriate.
How a female should eat, dress, sleep and die is being dictated by men. With the evolution of technology, even some people with no morals are enjoying the social media and sitting behind a screen, they can talk anything.
Our courts refuse to implement a law to curb social media atrocities. And this is the best example of world in the eyes of men. Why should a law be formed to reduce rape threats? So, a man should be punished only if he actually does it.
Threatening to do harm doesn't count?
Even the very act of rape by a husband is not illegal. The Constitution gives the rights to do it. The world of men!
Many people talk endlessly about culture. If a female wears westernized clothes, she is abusing our culture. But dear men, why can't you continue to wear dhotis for your work and meetings too? Why wear pants? Is your so called culture applicable only to women?
Also, if a news about rape comes in a newspaper, certain men start lamenting about the dress of the rape victim. She must have dressed provocatively and by doing so she was asking for it. I really started doubting that if early medicine didn't find out about a disease where brain was not present by birth, but the person lived. And those diseased by that unfound disease must be these kind of men.
As men have every right to dress however they want, women can dress however they want. No women will intend to dress provocatively to get raped. It is all in the eyes of the culprit.
They also argue that it kindles their desire and creates lust. And they say they are not responsible. How come they are not responsible? Every problem a woman has comes with men!
If a person cannot control your impulse and desire, he is not fit to live in a society. He should be sent to rot in a room without a window. But our courts give bail to those animals so that they can throw acid on the face of the woman for putting him in jail. And he can roam freely while the woman loses her life.
Every woman suffers and woman are being taught to not to show them. Right from suffering from pain every month. She has to bleed and tolerate pain and yet behave normally. Why so? Why is talking about menstruation still a taboo?
I know i am really hoping for a miracle when i am talking about paid menstrual leave. But, hopefully it will become a possibility.
During marriage, life of a woman changes. She is forced to get married to an unknown man and live with his family. Why? Why should a woman leave her whole family?
After marriage, if a woman wants a home alone from the husband's parents, she is labelled as a curse and called homewrecker. And the husband's family compares her to an evil witch. Wasn't that the same thing the whole family did to her?
But the most laughable part is dowry. The family of the bride gives money to the family of the groom. But the bride must leave her family.
If speaking logically, isn't the bride's family paying money for the groom? So technically the groom must shift base.
Because he is being sold there and treated as a marketable product!
Even after marriage, she is under the laws of the men. Taking care of everything is her job in addition to her actual paying job. And if she seeks help, she is not fit to be a woman.
I have seen women tolerating the beatings of their husbands.
The husband would beat her horribly and she will get treated herself at the hospital and go back to the devil himself. This sort of repeats itself until the death of anyone of them.
Once I asked a lady why can't she leave her husband and give a complaint. She was just 22. She said she has to take care of her kids. And if she gives a complaint he will leave her and their kids, and marry another woman. She didn't even know that it is illegal for her husband to marry another woman while she was still alive!
She also said one more thing which actually makes more sense. She said she is dependent on her husband for money. What will she do if he leaves her alone?
It was really sad to see the frightened face of her mother who will be dropping her daughter at her husband's home, where she was beaten to near death.
To be frank, it is woman like them, who are responsible for some men treating women like trash.
The matter of being dependent doesn't matter because more and more women are working now.
What matters is the thought that it is okay for men to behave like that! No. It is not okay for anyone to harm others!
Men have Y in place of X and the difference ends with that.
Talking back and talking against the atrocities against women are looked down upon as a cultural disruption by men.
In a place where the average rate for a pizza from a shop from USA tends to be cheaper than sanitary napkins, there are a lot of changes that need to happen.
It all should start from women. Because men do not have any role in giving out our rights.
It is lying there waiting to be taken and just don't give it to men!
It is not fighting for the rights of a woman. It should be better termed as having what was truly ours!
If all these things are going to be against the culture in the eyes of certain men, then I will rather be culture less.
A woman should know her place, they say. Let us show what our place truly is!
Monday, 16 October 2017
Musings of the mind are not so clear even to the mind which is thinking. But, that is how it should be.
Sorrow is such a sad word. Even hearing it makes us sad. We don't link the word 'sorrow' to any good memories. But, the sorrow has its own beautiful times too.
With something that brings joy, you gain your boost of happiness from the joy it gives rather than the act.
For example, if you are buying few things, the gaining of them is joy. You are yet to know how good the products will be. But you are happy still.
Take online shopping for example, you order things and you are happy. You see that it has been shipped and you are happy. You see that the parcel has arrived and that gives happines. You open them slowly and carefully and that is like the ultimate happiness. Your own gift for you. You know what is inside but even then you are so happy.
But imagine the opposite. I am not saying about outdoor shopping. But the sorrow.
It gives happiness too. I am not mad.
Imagine sitting alone with a cup of coffee and staring at the sky from your window. This actually makes a good canvas for the sorrow mess to become happiness.
You think of all the possible happy endings. What if it had been like this? Or what if it had been like that?
What if is the greatest question of the solemn minds. It is also a great way of imagining things. Or you could call them dreaming.
But what does it leads to? Happiness or sorrow? It leads to a painful happiness. A sort of feeling better felt and once you have understood it, you become a different person.
There is good in everything and equally bad in everything.
What does 'what if' leads to? Imagining things. Which in a way gives hope.
Hope for the hopeless!
What does happiness lead to? Answers are varied.
For a person who thinks happiness as a goal, it will lead to sorrow. Because it is not a goal that you achieve.
For someone who sees it as a component of life and enjoys it when it comes, it is happiness.
There are few others who think of happiness always. And when it comes they are afraid to lose it and do not realize the happy moment when it is there. For them, it leads to anxiety.
It will not be there with you forever because you cannot be feeling the same forever.
Only if you get to know what is bad, you will appreciate good. Securing yourself from the negative will never give you positiveness in life. It will only blind you to the joy that you deserve.
You will become old and wrought and whine that happiness never rang your bell. But in reality you ran away from your own home when happiness rang your bell.
Life gives a lot to take in. Living each moment doesn't mean enjoying every moment.
Living is living your happiness and also living your sorrow. Live your sorrow and live your joy. And you will be actually living!
Sunday, 20 August 2017
Tuesday, 3 January 2017
About the Book:
Nothing is perfect. Life is messy. Relationships are complex. Outcomes, uncertain. People, irrational. But love… Well, that makes complicates everything complicated. When you are caught in a tangled web of secrets, lies, and complex affairs, someone is bound to get burned.
Emily Stevens is a spunky, spirited college girl whose life is turned upside-down when she realizes she's in love with her best friend of fifteen years, Derek Thorpe. As Emily prepares to confess her feelings to Derek, something happens one night which changes her life forever. Five years later, Emily finds herself in Boston, alone and heartbroken. Will she ever be able to forget the past? And what will she find when she returns home... to the man she left behind?
About the Author:
Her first book, A Way Back Into Love, is slated for release in February 2017, and she hopes readers will enjoy it as much as she enjoyed writing it. You can reach Veronica through Facebook, Twitter, Goodreads, Wattpad and Gmail.
Contact the Author:
FB Page * FB Profile * Twitter * Wattpad
Friday, 30 December 2016
The Shadows of the Northlands
From the back cover:
This is the Empire.
The greatest nation in the known world.
And is at war
When the crown prince hears about cities and villages attacked and razed to the ground, the land blackened and left infertile, the already shackled military commands the maverick bounty-hunter Merin and the slick courtier mage Rikkard to find the root of the destruction.
However, as they tackle this mystery, they discover an ancient hatred spanning centuries, with a dark secret linked to Merin and the painful past behind the satirizing cavalier. A swashbuckling tale of suspenseful fantasy and horrifying mystery that is loaded with humour, Shadows of the Northlands will leave you riveted from cover to cover.
Title: Shadows of the Northlands
Author: Vishwesh Desai
Publisher: Estrade Publishers
Cost: 300 INR
From the blurb, one can get to know the genre of the book. Yes. Fantasy!
It always helps to read a fantasy and disappear from the real world for a while. This hyped me up, and I sat down to read this nearly 500 pages book.
The first few pages are dedicated to the introduction. You are slowly taken into their world. But, in the first few pages, what made me a little less enthusiastic in the journey was the 'words'.
Yes! Words! I know that if I am supposed to read a book, I must be well versed. I thought so.
But, those few pages made me look up to the dictionary for few words for which I was not able to decipher the meaning, which made me even more curious. With such trips to the online and offline dictionaries, I ended up learning about the Kingdom better.
After that, it didn't give me such a rough path. Why has the author oozed all his vocabulary in the first few pages? It was impressive. But, yet demanding. Also, it could only be me, for the distance between literature and my brain is becoming wider and wider by the year.
The book also has plenty of pages to cover. But, it didn't feel like a mammoth task. Once I got into the story, I was hooked.
The characters took charge from there, and I was into the story, until the end. Whether it was their journey or their conversations, it was well written.
But, the shock was waiting for me at the end. As a rule, I do not Google about the book or the author until I have completely read the book.
And as it was, I read the Foreword at the last. I was really awestruck reading it. I will leave it as a suspense for you all. But, it was worth it.
Monday, 19 December 2016
Colorful Notions - The Roadtrippers 1.0 by Mohit Goyal
- a review
It is a dream among friends. A dream that almost remains unconquered for most of the friend groups out there.
And that dream would be a roadtrip. Mostly to Goa. But, some have a knack of planning to the unventured.
So, this book was started with many expectations and let us see how it was.
Most of us would have planned a trip, when lying on our beds on a lazy Saturday evening, with no idea about our future or the next exam. In other words, plans would have been listed and those never make to the execution part in college life. But, for the protagonists of this story, Ab, Sasha and Unnati, it was not just a dream.
The novel starts with Ab trying to convince Sasha's parents about the trip. After getting their approval and a lot of expert tips from Sasha's uncle, they are half ready for the trip. The next hurdle before they start is a nod of approval from Unnati's family.
Having gathered all, Ab is left feeling that he is taking care of almost everything in the trip. Sasha is happy that he get to be with his girlfriend, Unnati for the trip.
They have planned to cover the north to the south, the east to the west of India. Whether it was a success or something not to be repeated, they were yet to find. And, the reader will find it soon enough.
Coming to the narrative in the book, it was a breeze. A gentle breeze to be more profound. Also, if the book is going to be a part of your trip, even more wonderful it would be.
Next to the plot of the story.
With Ab, Sasha and Unnati, we get a feeling that we are with them. But, if you are expecting more like a travelogue, it might not suffice. It holds more of their trip, along with their inner turmoil and their insecurities. If they are going to be together for the whole trip, they must deal with each other's habits, which might be annoying to the other.
They share a great deal of unexpected surprises which are pleasant, and some disasters which they didn't even expect to occur because of some silly pranks.
And they also face the brunt of their not so careful planning. The silliness of having planned to drive for long hours together make them delay their plans.
The story takes us to all the known directions. Sasha, being a foodie, makes sure that they stop at all the famous eateries and taste the flavour of the soil they have stepped into. From eating Idlis to Kebabs and Biriyani, they do everything.
As their trip goes up and down, they too face their inner demons and angels. And they fight to set them right in their right places. And with more and more hardships and challenges, they continue towards their goal, which is ticking of all the places in their list, and taking a numbered selfie at all places.
Overall, it was an easy to read and also equally enjoyable one. It is more about the traveling than the actual places they visit. If a few more pages had been allotted to all the beautiful places they have taken their car to, it would have been even more beautiful, for me .
Overall rating: 8/10